Achtung!: The Tote

Absolutely HAVE to share this hilarious story with you!

The tote is an indispensable item for work and recreation. I'm currently carrying a cavernous, black tote that holds everything - workout gear, laptop, wallet etc.

Last Friday I was running late for work. In a mad dash to jam everything I needed into my tote, it went like this:

• The everyday necessities (wallet, sunglasses etc) were already in the bag (at the bottom).
• Next, I threw in my gym gear: towel, shoes, clothing and the "unmentionables"
• Realizing I hadn't eaten breakfast, I reached for a banana and threw it in the tote.
• Remembering I needed a snack for work, I grabbed an English cucumber out of the fridge and threw THAT on top.
• Ready to go, I heaved my bulging tote over my shoulder and raced to the office.
  

I start my day at 7:00 am and the door to my building requires a pass card before 8:00 am. The card resides in my wallet (at the bottom of my tote). After two (unsuccessful) attempts at waving my tote in front of the card reader, I realized I must dig to the bottom to retrieve the pass card.

As I lowered my tote to the ground to rummage through it, I noticed a construction worker standing beside me at the door, obviously needing to be let into the building. So, as I'm pulling stuff out of my tote to find my card, the first things I removed were:

• one pair of bright blue, lace skivvies
• one banana
• one, very long, cucumber.

You can't make stuff like this up!

Wonder what the guy thought I did for a living?